I Am Sorry, Will You Forgive Me?
forgive who isn't sorryBetrayal causes the heart to close up and lock its doors. Being betrayed is one of life’s most painful experiences. The healing can take years to cure, yet for some the heartbreak is terminal.
The wound cuts deep and wreaks havoc on our ability to trust. Our belief in people is shattered. Insecurity overrides clear thinking and we protect our heart against others.
I’ve been betrayed and still suffer the effects of it. On the other hand, I cringe at the thought of my betrayal of others.
The definition of betrayed means disloyal, violation of trust, lead astray, uncover, disclose, divulge, forsake, expose and unfaithful. That is quite a compilation of damaging actions.
Listening recently to a story a pastor was sharing, stopped me dead in my tracks. Conviction set in when I felt the prompting words from that still small voice, “That is you.”
feel pain in chest
The story was about Noah and his three sons in Genesis 9:20-23. After the flood, Noah built a vineyard. One day after tasting some of the wine, he became drunk and was naked in his tent. One of his sons came in and saw him and immediately went out and told. He uncovered, disclosed and divulged information about his father that was inappropriate and disrespectful.
When the other two sons were told, they instantly took a blanket and walked into their father’s tent backwards and covered him. Their faces were turned the opposite way as to not shame their father. Instead these two sons honored him.
betrayal is not from enemies
I was guilty of being like the first son. I too had dishonored someone. I told people things I shouldn’t have. I violated trust and exposed. My heart hurts for the people involved. My regret is profound.
If only I had dealt with my pain and taken it directly to the Lord instead of seeking approval and validation from others. I wished I had cried alone in my pillow instead of revealing to those who would listen. But I wanted to be right and that other person to be wrong.
Regardless of fault, I can only deal with my own sinful actions. To those involved with a repentant heart I say, “I am sorry, will you forgive me?”